May 25th, 2017

Игра в терпение или капитальные затраты на воспитание ребёнка

Поскольку для меня это год развития английской речи, многие вещи я пишу теперь на этом чуждом языке.

To be a parent is a game. Who is smarter? Who is managing whom?
Baby has only instrument to manipulate: crying and disobedience. Parent has much more tools, but whther he can use it?
It is necessary to train patience and ability to detour dialog or conflict.

Example from my son Timur.
He doesn't like to walk. Father's shoulder is much better. Yeap, totally agree with that way of thinking. But I make him walk more.
If he disagrees, he just lies down on the ground, dirty, wet and cold and stay in this position while somebody takes him. But NO. Nobody does it. He lies for several minutes, smudging his clothes, and after all he has to get up.
There is no way to manipulate me in this way. He is smart enough in his 1,8 years old to understand my words and follow proposal.
- Timur, we will walk to the crossroad and there I will take him.

Example from my daughter Samira. In the morning:
- Dad, where are you going?
- To work.
- Why?
- To do my job.
- Why?
- To earn money.
- Why?
- To feed you well.
- Why?
- To make you halthy and smiling.
- Why?
- Are you smiling now?
- Yes, dad.
- So do you like this feelig?
- Yeap.
- That's the reason.

This endless WHYs can kill any parent if he start answering fairly. For child it is game, he really doesn't care about answers sometimes. He is investigating the borders. I proceed to 5-6 steps deeper and then detour his curiosity from asking to answering. Yes, It requires a little patience. But it is my CapEx to the future.